three weeks ago all the trees were bare. now our courtyard is full of green leaves. it was pretty hot today. i spent a few hours on suomenlinna, then i walked around town for a little bit then came home and opened all the windows and fell asleep as a summer breeze came through the apartment.

my only hot summer ever was a summer in new york city. even now, five years later, i can still imagine intensity of the heat there. on days like today when it is as warm as it was in nyc, all i can think about it nyc. most days something happens to me that reminds me of nyc for a quick moment. be it weather, or simple noises like the screeching of trains or random other things. anyway, i am hoping this summer in helsinki will be a hot one, i need to try to lose those memory associations i have with nyc a little bit and move on. although if there was one place/thing in the world that was hard to get over it would have to be new york city. it seems to be by far the most recognised and idolised place. no matter what one does sooner or later it meets up with new york. a few quotes from new york vertical:

new york is my lourdes, where i go for spiritual refreshment brendan behan, irish playwright times square, centre of the universe. you have connections to the n, r, a, c, e, f, d, and q train anonymous, subway conductor

this fascination i have has to be reconciled with the thought that it is just one city, that things that happen there happen daily in countless other places around the world, that it means different things to different people, that what i think it is might not match with what it is now or what it was then.